I had 3 different new rules written in response to things I did with vehicles at 1 ambulance station I worked for.
General The "Dumb Shit I've Done" thread
- Thread starter MountainMedic
- Start date
Exactly
You gonna leave us wondering?
I got a flat and my spare was never filled, I took the tire to the closest garage and I told them to bill the state. Then got a phone call from fleet maintenance a week later asking why I went to that garage. Because you idiots didn't fill my spare when you gave me my explorer. Would you rather have paid for a tow 60 miles away to the garage? He hung up on me.
I have a very similar story involving throwing lemons at cars from a grove, as well as shooting cars with paintball guns.
Having said that, no need to retell those stories, since they basically ended up like yours, except with the paintball guns and getting brought home by the police.
I will tell this though, since it is kind of on the same topic. I was in Guadalajara with my family for a "special" trip since my uncle was being ordained a priest. We were staying in downtown in a hotel and my mother and grandparents went out for a late night meal. No idea why we were left at the hotel, but my sister and I were left alone in the room. I don't remember what floor we were on, but we were up there. We were bored and kids will be kids, and I was looking for something to do. The windows opened completely up, unlike in first world countries, so I decided to throw things at traffic. I started by wetting toilet paper and chucking it down, quite fun, but ultimately got boring. I graduated to full toilet paper rolls completely soaked in the sink. First direct hit changed that completely. I hit a cab smack dab on the roof and it made the loudest noise (had to be 3 or more pounds since it was saturated) and the cab screeched to a halt. At that moment I realized maybe that wasn't the best idea in a third world country. We quickly turned off lights, closed all windows, drew the curtains, and jumped into bed laughing nervously. When my mother and grandparents returned adrenaline was still pumping, but we pretended to be asleep. We were the best kids in the world the rest of the trip. Fortunately we were never caught, but that would have been some shit.
I was with 3 friends and a random girl that my friend hooked up with in Ensenada when a cop car pulled up and put all of us against the wall. The cop said we were with a prostitute (she was a skank American) and that was illegal (it is not, prostitution is legal there, within the "tolerance zone" we were in, and he was looking for money). I was detained in the back of a cop car after some questioning with one of my friends, while my other friend and the skank were still being shaken down. I had to piss since we just left a bar and had no idea if we would be hauled around for a few hours before coughing up enough cash to make this cop happy (been there, done that several times). I told my friend I had to piss and he was flipping out saying hold it, but I whipped out my half inch and pissed all over the floor of the cop car. We eventually were let out after a "donation" to the court system and as soon as the cop car was out of sight we ran like banshees to the safety of my friend's house. That one could have turned out really bad. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when the cop realized piss was all over the floor (no carpet, so it was sloshing back and forth when he drove. LOL
So many Mexico stories you just forget about...
So many Mexico stories you just forget about...
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I don't like that tower, not 1 bit
Most recently about a year ago, my mom peeled my skin off my burnt back from a sunburn.
I forgot & was working until I couldn't move, but was already 2 oxycodones deep on the day, so I told my kid to spray my back with biofreeze.
A mistake I won't forget.
Before that first to memory was a laptop HP Spectre 360 back in 2016.
There's about 2000 bucks back then and I told myself that I wasn't going to get insurance because if I f***** it up I deserved it.
I went to Baltimore New York Washington DC Philadelphia all of that and had pictures Galore with my brother and videos and everything.
I had it by my bedside when I got home and spilt water on it.
So I went and put it by the space heater in the wall.
I forgot about it and went oh s*** I'd better go get it, and when I got it it was like touching a stove.
Keyboard melted, laptop destroyed, non-recoverable data.
I forgot & was working until I couldn't move, but was already 2 oxycodones deep on the day, so I told my kid to spray my back with biofreeze.
A mistake I won't forget.
Before that first to memory was a laptop HP Spectre 360 back in 2016.
There's about 2000 bucks back then and I told myself that I wasn't going to get insurance because if I f***** it up I deserved it.
I went to Baltimore New York Washington DC Philadelphia all of that and had pictures Galore with my brother and videos and everything.
I had it by my bedside when I got home and spilt water on it.
So I went and put it by the space heater in the wall.
I forgot about it and went oh s*** I'd better go get it, and when I got it it was like touching a stove.
Keyboard melted, laptop destroyed, non-recoverable data.
I did that on my chaffed balls. You know when you work outside all day, walking back and forth or you just do a lot of cardio? Your thighs and pelotas rub together a lot and chaffe. I did what you did on my balls and dropped myself instantly. Indescribable pain. Its like something Pinhead would torture you with.
I did that on my chaffed balls. You know when you work outside all day, walking back and forth or you just do a lot of cardio? Your thighs and pelotas rub together a lot and chaffe. I did what you did on my balls and dropped myself instantly. Indescribable pain. Its like something Pinhead would torture you with.
Dear Lord, grant me The ability to accept the pain I cannot take...
I chafe a lot especially during the summer.
Vaseline is my best friend, for my crotch of course, no other reason....
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I ran out of Vaseline and cooling my hot balls seemed like a great idea.
I put one right through my foot when I was real little.This is routinely me around yard tools.
Almost the same color purse too.
They were right about loony tunes giving us terrible ideas.
I saw a rake on the ground and said "hey mom, watch!" and stepped on it hard. I thought it would come up like that, bink me, and everyone would laugh.
Nope, could see 2 tines sticking up through my foot.
Daffy Duck made it look easy and hilarious. It was neither.
Great transition into impaling.
Let's hear 'em..... nails, screws, axes and hatchets, chainsaws, any saw, drills and drivers, pitchforks
Well, got a new one..
Went to dog park at 8 to beat the heat today. After an hour i ran a couple errands.
There's a skatepark <5mins from my house that I've seen but never checked out, so I stopped on the way home to look at the pool better.
As I'm thinking "I hope that dog doesn't jump into the pool" I look up to see him fall over the coping into the deep end. Of course there's about 3" of water in the bottom and he did a body slide through that.
Now he's all wet and made a big splash and everywhere he goes is wet from him dripping everywhere so everything is slippery and he can't even run up into the shallow end.
I had to jump down there, find the one area he hadn't hosed down, and drag him into the shallow and then lift him out over the coping.
Hes currently bumming in the yard drying out and I'm covered in wet swampy dog hair. Chest to knees, lol.
Went to dog park at 8 to beat the heat today. After an hour i ran a couple errands.
There's a skatepark <5mins from my house that I've seen but never checked out, so I stopped on the way home to look at the pool better.
As I'm thinking "I hope that dog doesn't jump into the pool" I look up to see him fall over the coping into the deep end. Of course there's about 3" of water in the bottom and he did a body slide through that.
Now he's all wet and made a big splash and everywhere he goes is wet from him dripping everywhere so everything is slippery and he can't even run up into the shallow end.
I had to jump down there, find the one area he hadn't hosed down, and drag him into the shallow and then lift him out over the coping.
Hes currently bumming in the yard drying out and I'm covered in wet swampy dog hair. Chest to knees, lol.